Dear Mum and Dad,
Please help me to love myself.
Don’t spoil me. I know quite well that I shouldn’t get all that I ask for, I’m only testing you- but please give me the discipline I need!
I need my sense of dignity , so please don’t belittle me in front of people> I’ll take more notice if you talk to me with as much respect as you give to your best grown up friends.
Don’t ridicule me or imply that my inappropriate behaviour means that I am bad. It erodes my sense of worthiness.
Don’t be too upset, when sometimes I say I hate you. It isn’t you I hate but your power over me.
Please be patient with me, I may be a late bloomer.
When you have a bad day, pleased don’t take your frustrations out on me.
Please don’t shout or nag. If you do I shall have to protect myself by appearing to be deaf.
Please help me feel good about myself by telling me of the good things about myself more often than you tell me of the things you don’t like.
Don’t bribe me or make me rash promises.
Remember that I feel badly let down when promises are broken.
The more you give me the safety to expose my true feelings, the more of my inner beauty I will risk showing.
Don’t be inconsistent. That completely confuses me and makes me lose faith in you.
Don’t tell me my fears are silly. They are terribly real and you can do much to reassure me if you try to understand.
Don’t ever think that it is beneath your dignity to apologize to me. An honest apology makes me feel surprisingly warm towards you.
Please praise and acknowledge me for the things I do, for then I will grow up without the stress of comparing and competing.
Please keep reminding me that I am basically good and capable and worthwhile, so I can grow up loving and accepting myself.
Don’t forget that I can’t thrive without a lot of love and understanding… but I don’t need to tell you, do I?